I wish I could narrow it down to an event or two, but honestly I hate it all. I hate having to wake up and take care of a body that's slowly dying. I hate having to get dressed for a job I hate to get money to be able to sustain this body so I can work more to get more money to sustain this body. I hate going to college cause I don't give a fuck about anything. Nothing sparks any meaningful amount of joy in me so why the fuck do I have to do things. I'm just running up the clock until god or whatever the fuck is at the end of this dumb fucking game tells me its over. I wish I cared. I wish there was something that gave me hope. I wish there was something that I wanted to do but ultimately I hate having to do anything. Don't get me twisted, I don't want things handed to me, no. I don't want, anything. I don't want to work, I don't want to learn, I don't want to create, I don't want to consume. I'm only alive since I don't want to hurt the few people I care about but, I hate it all.